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1. The Captain and the Lady/One if by Land/Centerfold
Community Score
| 9.3 Superb |
Captain Stubing and his ex-wife have to face the realities of a badly resolved separation when they find themselves trapped on the same cruise. The future wife of a powerful political congressman worries that the photo she took for an erotic magazine some years back will jeopardize her husband's political career, so she tries to cover this fact from him, by hiding all the copies of the magazine that are available in the ship, until she finds the courage to confess her past to her husband. Ginny O'Brien is followed by her hard-to-commit boyfriend through all the ports where the cruise passes. However she's not going to accept a relationship without a proposal of marriage
Director: Richard Kinon, Alan Rafkin, Stuart Margolin
Guest star: Jimmie Walker (Arnold) , Bonnie Franklin (Stacy Skogstad), Robert Symonds (Aubrey Skogstad), Brenda Sykes (Ginny O'Brian), Suzanne Somers (Lorraine Hoffman), Shelly Novack (Brad Brockway), Meredith Baxter Birney (Sandy Rytell), Gertrude Flynn, Ted Chapman, Chris Capen (College Guy)
2. Oh, Dale!
Community Score
| 8.1 Great |
A jilted boyfriend desperately tries to win back the woman who left him, but the only cabin left on the ship is a double -- with a woman. So he dresses in drag.
Director: Alan Rafkin
Guest star: Jennifer Shaw (Joanne Dressen), Mark Thomas (I) (Peter Pringle), Tovah Feldshuh (Susan Ridley), John Ritter (Dale Riley)
2. A Tasteful Affair
First aired: 10/1/1977A private detective hired to find out if a beautiful woman is having an affair poses as a fellow passenger and falls in love with her during his investigation.
Director: Richard Kinon
Guest star: Dennis Cole (Dennis Kingsley), Jaclyn Smith (Janette Bradford), Jack Perkins (Drunk), Craig Littler (Carl Daggett), Tiiu Leek (Linda Daggett), David Knapp (Lucas Bradford)
2. The Main Event
Community Score
| 8.1 Great |
The "Sausage King" and his wife, always bickering, get themselves trapped in one of the ship's elevators.
Director: Stuart Margolin
Guest star: Sherman Hemsley (Maurice Marshall), LaWanda Page (Stella Marshall)
3. Ex Plus Y/Graham and Kelly/Goldenagers
Community Score
| 4.9 Poor |
A divorced couple takes the cruise with new mates, and can't seem to avoid one another or stop arguing. Two adolescents develop an awkward flirtation. A senior group inadvertently interferes with its director's fledgling romance with Julie.
Director: Alan Rafkin, Stuart Margolin
Guest star: Robert Reed (Barney Mason) , Loretta Swit (Terry Larson), Kristy McNichol (Kelly Rixey), Scott Baio (Graham D. Pickrel II), Hermione Baddeley (Kitty Pickrel), Richard Mulligan (Ron Larson), Charles Frank (Jim Wright), Edward Andrews (Senior Group Leader), Pamela Bellwood (Judy Watson), Queenie Smith (Helen Lindsay), Betty Kean (Mrs. Svenson), Florence Halop (Millie Lindsay)
4. Message for Maureen/The Acapulco Connection/Gotcha
Community Score
| 8.2 Great |
A tennis star, temporarily confined to a wheelchair due to a back injury, rekindles an old romance with a sportswriter who had been critical of her recent performances. A woman with singing aspirations stows away on the ship in the hopes of making it to America and providing for her large family. A man annoys his wife and other passengers by constantly playing practical jokes.
Director: Richard Kinon, Stuart Margolin, Peter Baldwin
Guest star: Milton Berle (Cyril Wolfe), Audra Lindley (Anita Wolfe), Charo (April Lopez) , Brenda Benet (Maureen Mitchell), Bill Bixby (John Ballard), Mary Grace Canfield (Housekeeper), Britt Leach (Reverend Dickerson), Lynn Adams (Mrs. Dickerson)
5. Help, Murder/Isaac the Groupie/Mr. Popularity
Community Score
| 9.6 Superb |
A woman gets the wrong idea from her husband's secretive behavior and fears that he is plotting to murder her. Isaac begins a whirlwind romance with an internationally known singer. A couple suspects that a painfully boring passenger is actually a wanted jewel thief.
Director: Peter Baldwin, Stuart Margolin, James Sheldon
Guest star: Michele Lee (Denise Fredricks) , Diahann Carroll (Roxy Blue), David Groh (Brett Fredricks), Jim Nabors (Robert Tanner), Reva Rose (Myra Grove), Paul Tinder (Crew Member), Olan Soule (Harvey Grove), Dorothy Konrad (Heavy Woman), Bob Hastings (Customer), Russ Grieve (Man), Lou Cutell (Chef)
6. The Joker is Mild/First Time Out/Take My Granddaughter, Please
Community Score
| 9.2 Superb |
An old friend of Julie's father turns to her for help reviving his sputtering stand-up comedy career. A meddling woman tries to interfere in her granddaughter's love life; she pushes her to date Doc, but her granddaughter wants to pursue romance with an old friend. A young man's fraternity brothers pressure him to lose his virginity during the cruise.
Director: Richard Kinon, Alan Rafkin
Guest star: Maureen McCormick (Barbara Hodges) , Ruth Gordon (Mrs. Warner), W.K. Stratton (Kyle), John Mark Robinson, Meegan King (Paul), Patty Duke (Shirley Warner), Tab Hunter (Dave King), Phil Foster (Barry Keys), Bob Hackman (Freddy Stevens), Mary Moon, Robert Hegyes (Danny)
7. Identical Problem/Julie's Old Flame/The Jinx
Community Score
| 7.8 Good |
Identical twins pretend to be one person in order to take the cruise on one fare, but bewilder Doc since one likes him but not the other. Julie gets re-acquainted with an ex-lover, who claims to have broken up with his wife. After suffering a series of accidents, the crew comes to believe that an elderly couple--who survived the Titanic--is cursed.
Director: Don Weis
Guest star: Diana Canova (Helen/Ellen Edwards), David Hedison (Buddy Stanfield), Ray Bolger (Horace McDonald), Harriet Nelson (Henrietta McDonald), Alana Stewart (Mrs. Stanfield)
8. Lost and Found/The Understudy/Married Singles
Community Score
| 10.0 Perfect |
A boy befriends a couple that recently lost its young son. A trainee schemes to steal Julie's job. A bickering married couple takes the cruise and stays in separate cabins...next door to each other.
Director: Stuart Margolin
Guest star: Jo Ann Harris (Connie Evans), Steve Allen (Durwood Moss), Polly Bergen (Macy (Noland) Moss), Sandy Duncan (Shannon Baker), Jim Stafford (Richard Baker), Joshua Bryant (Jack Plymouth), Hayden Rorke (Mr. Humbertson), Loni Anderson (Barbie), J. Jay Saunders (Theodore Dennison), Marilyn Coleman (Mrs. Dennison), Montana Smoyer (Woman), James Bond III (Theodore Denison Jr.)
9. The Captain's Captain/Hounded/Romance Roulette
Community Score
| 7.9 Good |
The presence of the captain's demanding father leaves the entire crew on edge. A dog traps a passenger in his cabin. Three friends reunite on board the ship and try to meet men through an unusual game.
Director: Jack Arnold
Guest star: Phil Silvers (Merrill Stubing Sr.), Judy Canova (PJ), Gary Burghoff (Donald M. Flanders), David Landsberg (Morton), Vincent Baggetta (Frank), Susan Heldfond (Toby Chapman), Joanna Kerns (Beth), Jane Curtin (Regina Parker), Markus Parilo, Gina Sorell
10. Dear Beverly/The Strike/Special Delivery
Community Score
| 6.9 Fair |
An advice columnist neglects her husband to devote all her time to her fans, prompting him to seek affection elsewhere. A man with a negative history with Capt. Stubing fills in for the ailing chef. A frequent passenger, who is depressed about his impending divorce, winds up on the same cruise as his pregnant wife (who has failed to tell him about the baby). They somehow keep narrowly missing each other.
Director: Allen Baron
Guest star: Eva Gabor (Beverly Blanchard), Leslie Nielsen (Russ), Al Molinaro (Chef Borga), Pamela Franklin (Gail Smith), Robert Urich (Jeff Smith), Stephanie Blackmore (Peggy), Meg Wyllie (Sister #2), Mary Treen (Sister #1), Lila Kent (Young Woman)
11. Lonely at the Top/Divorce Me, Please/Silent Night
Community Score
| 7.6 Good |
12. The Old Man and the Runaway/A Fine Romance/The Painters
Community Score
| 9.1 Superb |
A crotchety old man and a teenage runaway form an unlikely friendship. Julie grows frustrated when an old friend of her brother's repeatedly rejects her advances without explanation. A pair of incompetent painters continually screws up the re-painting of Capt. Stubing's cabin.
Director: Stuart Margolin, James Sheldon
Guest star: Arte Johnson (Ronald) , Will Geer (Frank Botherstone), Pat Morita (Vincent), Anson Williams (Sean McGlynn), Tom Poston (Mickey O'Day), Bayn Johnson (Nancy Brown)
13. Family Reunion/Too Hot to Handle/Cinderella Story
Community Score
| 10.0 Perfect |
A woman who believes her departed dad was a noble sea captain forms an attachment for a devilish old purser; a newlywed couple are prevented by dislocated backs, sunburn and even poison ivy from enjoying their honeymoon; the crew upgrades a couple with modest means to a luxurious suite without consulting Capt. Stubing, forcing the couple to pose as wealthy socialites.
Director: James Sheldon, Richard Kinon
Guest star: Bob Crane (Teddy), John Rubinstein (George Allison), Bruce Solomon (Bill Edwards), Rosemary DeCamp (Cynthia), Don DeFore (Mr. Loudon), David White (Beatty), Victoria Carroll (Ginger), Dori Brenner (Wendy Bradley), Robert Hays (Sam Bradley), Judy Luciano Adams, Earl Montgomery, Kathy Bates (Doreen Allison)
14. Isaac's Double Standard/One More Time/Chimpanzeeshines
Community Score
| 9.0 Superb |
Isaac's possessive mother becomes jealous of her son's lady friend, while he objects to his mom sharing a cabin with her latest boyfriend; a divorced comedy team is too busy making jokes to admit they miss each other; Gopher's budding romance is nearly foiled by a jewel-stealing monkey.
Director: James Sheldon, Richard Kinon
Guest star: Don Adams (Lenny Camen) , F. William Parker, Pearl Bailey (Millie Washington), Nanette Fabray (Mitzy Monroe), Kim Lankford (Ann Parker), Allyn Ann McLerie (Cynthia Parker), Tracy Reed (Charlene), Louise Redknapp (The Monkey), Arthur Adams (Roy Harwood), Montana Smoyer (Woman)
15. Hollywood Royalty/The Caper/The Eyes of Love/Masquerade (1)
Community Score
| 10.0 Perfect |
16. Hollywood Royalty/The Caper/The Eyes of Love/Masquerade (2)
Community Score
| 10.0 Perfect |
17. The Congressman Was Indiscreet/Isaac's History Lesson/Winner Take Love
Community Score
| 10.0 Perfect |
A congressman unjustly accused of being involved in a scandal seeks refuge aboard the Pacific Princess; Isaac and a lovely intellectual snob clash over a colorful old passenger; a beauty pageant contestant's whose chances of winning are jeopardized by her possessive boyfriend.
18. The Last of the Stubings/The Million Dollar Man/The Sisters
Community Score
| 10.0 Perfect |
19. The Inspector/A Very Special Girl/Until the Last Goodbye
First aired: 2/11/1978The crew after being informed that an inspector from the line will coming on board to do a report on them, but not knowing who he is, they try to be extra nice to anyone whom they is the inspector but always come up wrong. Two girls, one a stunner, the other, a plain girl. Now when two guys compete for the hot girl and when one of them gets her, the other has to take care of her companion.
20. Computerman/Parlez-Vous/Memories of You
Community Score
| 9.5 Superb |
A slick computer matchmaker proceeds to pair up cruise guests while setting himself up with Julie; two American gold-diggers pretend to be French; a New York advertising executive meets up with a long-lost love.
21. Taking Sides/A Friendly Little Game/Going by the Book
Community Score
| 7.9 Good |
22. Parents Know Best/A Selfless Love/The Nubile Nurse
Community Score
| 6.2 Fair |
A couple takes their son on a cruise in an attempt to end his relationship with an unsuitable girl; a May-December couple rethink their romance; an ex-showgirl's glamorous past jeopardizes her new career as a registered nurse.
23. Musical Cabins
Community Score
| 9.9 Superb |
A young bachelor must marry within the week in order to claim a $3 million inheritance; a drab widow poses as a glamorous adventuress and captures the heart of the Captain; a confirmed male chauvinist angers his fiancee, who finds comfort in sick bay with Doc; a scandal sheet reporter sets out to compile material for a sins-at-sea story.
24. The Business of Love/Crash Diet Crisis/I'll Never Fall in Love Again
Community Score
| 9.3 Superb |
A reformed prostitute causes trouble between a one-time "John" and his wife; Captain Stubing re-encounters an old flame; a fun-loving older couple help bring two lovers back together
25. Gopher the Rebel/Cabin Fever/Pacific Princess Overture
Community Score
| 9.9 Superb |
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