1. Pilot  

First aired: 9/11/1995    Production Code: 475098

In the pilot episode, the Claytons consider buying a house to move out of their dinky little apartment.

Meanwhile, Danny's best friend Jane is staying over (a lot),because as it is soon revealed her mother is sleeping around.

2. A Woman's Work is Never Done  

First aired: 9/13/1995    Production Code: 457551

Alice applies for a job as a legal secretary, then is fired from her head cashier's position when her boss learns of the interview.

Meanwhile, Danny brings home Matthew, her first boyfriend (who is 14, two years older than her), and then is crushed when her schoolmates spread lewd accusations about her and Matthew.

3. Company Loves Misery  

First aired: 9/20/1995    Production Code: 457552

Ever-bickering Lenny and Phyllis hope to inject some romance into their marriage by tagging along for Burt and Alice's anniversary celebration.

4. A Date Which Will Live in Infamy  

First aired: 9/27/1995    Production Code: 457553

Alice and Burt are divided over whether to let 12-year-old Danny goes to the movies alone with Matthew.

Meanwhile, everyone's plans are stalled when the family car is stolen while Alice is at an ATM.

5. I Am Not My Sister's Keeper  

First aired: 10/11/1995    Production Code: 457555

Burt has never been fond of his sister's boyfriend, and the latest one is no exception.

6. Where There's Smoke, You're Fired  

First aired: 10/18/1995    Production Code: 457554

Frustrated by her jerk of a teenage boss at her temporary job, Alice starts smoking again -- and catches Danny in the mall washroom with a pack of cigarettes; Burt tries to resist Vicki's amorous advances.

7. The Road to Hell is Paved With Good Intentions  

First aired: 10/25/1995    Production Code: 457556

Burt's dogged by a guilty conscience when he forgets to pick up Sean from school, so he tries to make amends by getting him a puppy.

8. A Fight a Day Keeps the Doctor Away  

First aired: 11/1/1995    Production Code: 457556

The Claytons resume their house hunting and also decide to get a new life-insurance policy, but Burt fears he won't pass the required physical exam.

9. Fish and Guests Stink After Three Days  

First aired: 11/8/1995    Production Code: 457558

As the Claytons prepared to move into their new home, Lenny -- still feuding with his wife -- assumes he's coming along.

10. The Postman Always Moves Twice  

First aired: 11/15/1995    Production Code: 457559

Before moving into their new home, the Claytons trash their apartment to get back at their landlord. But unfortunately the new house isn't ready and their stuck in their old apartment, while the heat is on full blast and the water's cut off.

11. Neither a Borrower Nor a Landlord Be  

First aired: 11/22/1995    Production Code: 457560

Forced to choose between having a deranged neighbor of having "our house foreclosed on before we even make the first mortgage payment," the Claytons decide to rent out their new home.

12. If It Ain't Broke, Break It  

First aired: 12/13/1995    Production Code: 457561

Burt buys an expensive reclining chair from an obnoxious salesman.

13. Misery on 34th Street  

First aired: 12/20/1995    Production Code: 457562

It's a joyless Christmas at the Claytons' when Alice's mother Sheila arrives with unwanted advice on how to discipline Danny, leaving Burt to play referee for the feuding females.

14. The Bowling Method  

First aired: 1/3/1996    Production Code: 457563

After one pregnancy scare too many, Burt and Alice decide that one of them will have to undergo surgery.

15. One Man's Ceiling Is Another Man's Stereo  

First aired: 1/10/1996    Production Code: 457565

The Claytons have a problem with a neighbor that will not stop playing his stereo loudly.

16. Natural Born Parents  

First aired: 1/17/1996    Production Code: 457566

When Danny gets an A in English, Burt and Alice are understandably proud, but then they discover it was because of her school project -- corresponding with a pen pal who happens to be a mass murderer.